How to Talk About Having Safer Sex

Scared to talk about safer sex with your partner? We've got your back. Learn about how to have safer sex, and how to talk to your partner about using condoms, dental dams, and more. Learn more about safer sex: https://www.plannedparenthood.org/lea... Narrator: Ok, so you two want to have sex with each other. Yay for you! But before you get to the good stuff, you need to talk about being safe. You need to talk about using protection when you have vaginal, anal, or oral sex. All the things you need to make your sex, the best sex. Guy: Aren’t you on the pill? Girl: Yeah… Guy: So…why do we need this? Girl: Well, I would feel safer if I had extra protection...and I definitely don’t want to worry about STDs. Guy: Why’d you have to go there? I’m not trying to think about that right now. Girl: Neither am I, so how about you wear this, and then neither of us has to worry about STDs or getting pregnant, so we can focus on each other? Guy: But it feels so much better without one. Condoms get so dry. Girl: I don’t think we’ll have that problem. And honestly, I’m not gonna do it without a condom . I care too much about myself to risk my health like that, and I care about you too. Come on babe…I’ll put it on for you [her hands moves offscreen Guy: Okay, I’m in. Narrator: Safer sex can definitely be sexy sex — it’s all about attitude. Let’s check out another couple. Girl 1: Look what I got today [pulls out a sheer glyde dam from a box] Girl 2: What is that? Girl 1: It’s a dam – you use it for oral to prevent STDs. Girl 2: Come on. Girls don't get STDs from other girls. Girl 1: My doctor said that’s actually not true. It’s more common if you go down on a guy, but you can still get STDs in your mouth from eating a girl out - like, you can get herpes that way. Girl 2: Oh, for real? [Girl 1: Yeah [maybe]] Lemme see that. Wow, that… feels a lot better than I thought it would! Mmmm, it smells like vanilla. Girl 1: Wanna try it? Maybe it’ll be fun! You know…different sensations and what not. Girl 2: Hmmm, ok, but I wanna go first! Girl 1: No problem Narrator: STDs don’t discriminate — anyone who has any kind of sex can get an STD. That’s why safer sex is important for everyone. Here’s one more example. Guy 1: Where do you keep your condoms? Guy 2: Oh don’t worry, I’m clean. Guy 1: Okay…when was the last time you were tested? Guy 2: I dunno, but I’m clean. Guy 1: Wait, so you don’t use condoms AND you don’t get tested? Guy 2: Well, I mean, I use condoms sometimes. Look, chill. It’s all good down there, I promise. I’ve never had any problems. And I think I would know if something was up with my junk. Guy 1: You know that’s not how it works, right? Most people who have STDs don’t have any symptoms. I have a friend who had gonorrhea — for, probably, like, months — and he had no idea he had it until he got tested. And he’d been sleeping with people without using a condom because he thought he was clean. Guy 2: Wait, what? Guy 1: Yeah. I mean, I’m not trying to be a buzzkill, but I can’t do this without a condom. I’d be too stressed out to enjoy it anyway. Guy 2: I’m sorry, I don’t think I have any condoms… Guy 1: Well, good thing I do. Guy 2: Ooooh you’re so prepared. Narrator: Talking about STDs and safer sex can feel awkward at first, but once you actually do it, it gets easier. And protecting your health and your partner’s health is a great way to show them that you know what you’re doing when it comes to sex. But there’s more to this than just safer sex — you’ve gotta get tested, too. Here’s how to deal with those conversations. Narrator: Ok, so you two want to have sex with each other. Yay for you! But before you get to the good stuff, you need to talk about being safe. You need to talk about using protection when you have vaginal, anal, or oral sex. All the things you need to make your sex, the best sex. Guy: Aren’t you on the pill? Girl: Yeah… Guy: So…why do we need this? Girl: Well, I would feel safer if I had extra protection...and I definitely don’t want to worry about STDs. Guy: Why’d you have to go there? I’m not trying to think about that right now. Girl: Neither am I, so how about you wear this, and then neither of us has to worry about STDs or getting pregnant, so we can focus on each other? Guy: But it feels so much better without one. Condoms get so dry. Girl: I don’t think we’ll have that problem. And honestly, I’m not gonna do it without a condom . I care too much about myself to risk my health like that, and I care about you too. Come on babe…I’ll put it on for you [her hands moves offscreen Guy: Okay, I’m in. Narrator: Safer sex can definitely be sexy sex — it’s all about attitude. Let’s check out another couple. Girl 1: Look what I got today [pulls out a sheer glyde dam from a box] Girl 2: What is that? Girl 1: It’s a dam – you use it for oral to prevent STDs. Girl 2: Come on. Girls don't get STDs from other girls. Girl 1: My doctor said that’s actually not true. It’s more common if you go down on a guy, but you can still get STDs in your mouth from eating a girl out - like, you can get herpes that way. Girl 2: Oh, for real? [Girl 1: Yeah [maybe]] Lemme see that. Wow, that… feels a lot better than I thought it would! Mmmm, it smells like vanilla. Girl 1: Wanna try it? Maybe it’ll be fun! You know…different sensations and what not. Girl 2: Hmmm, ok, but I wanna go first! Girl 1: No problem Narrator: STDs don’t discriminate — anyone who has any kind of sex can get an STD. That’s why safer sex is important for everyone. Here’s one more example. Guy 1: Where do you keep your condoms? Guy 2: Oh don’t worry, I’m clean. Guy 1: Okay…when was the last time you were tested? Guy 2: I dunno, but I’m clean. Guy 1: Wait, so you don’t use condoms AND you don’t get tested? Guy 2: Well, I mean, I use condoms sometimes. Look, chill. It’s all good down there, I promise. I’ve never had any problems. And I think I would know if something was up with my junk. Guy 1: You know that’s not how it works, right? Most people who have STDs don’t have any symptoms. I have a friend who had gonorrhea — for, probably, like, months — and he had no idea he had it until he got tested. And he’d been sleeping with people without using a condom because he thought he was clean. Guy 2: Wait, what? Guy 1: Yeah. I mean, I’m not trying to be a buzzkill, but I can’t do this without a condom. I’d be too stressed out to enjoy it anyway. Guy 2: I’m sorry, I don’t think I have any condoms… Guy 1: Well, good thing I do. Guy 2: Ooooh you’re so prepared. Narrator: Talking about STDs and safer sex can feel awkward at first, but once you actually do it, it gets easier. And protecting your health and your partner’s health is a great way to show them that you know what you’re doing when it comes to sex. But there’s more to this than just safer sex — you’ve gotta get tested, too. Here’s how to deal with those conversations.more

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